It Depends

This post catches me up through October 6.

Exposure visit was so refreshing! We got to explore outside of our training site town for the first time (minus our one day in Windhoek). All 54 of us were sent in small groups to current education volunteers’ sites. I traveled with two others down to the southern Hardap region. It took us about 5 hours to reach our volunteer Frances’ site, where she lives in the Kalahari desert. To move around in Namibia we “hike”. And no, that’s not Camino style or 14er style. Hiking means going to informal gathering places (gas stations, supermarkets) and waiting at a taxi stand to find a ride to in the direction of the town you want to go to. There are set fees depending on where you start and end; this isn’t hitch hiking. It works like Uber/Lyft, just without an app. You might get a ride in a small sedan or a 14-passenger van (called a kombi). It’s kinda fun, as long as you get a ride at the time you expect and don’t have car trouble! So with my beginner’s luck, I had a fun first experience. We had to take 4 different hikes to get to Frances’ site, as the south is more sparsely populated than the north. The last stretch was 20 minutes down a dirt road. Which felt like home! I kept thinking that if I was blindfolded and dropped off there, I might guess I was in northwestern New Mexico/Four Corners area, just with redder sand.

Frances lives in a very small mission town, so we stayed in priest housing (20 room dormitory + kitchen, all to ourselves) and not at her house. She works at a hostel primary school with grades 0-7 and about 150 learners total. This was an interesting contrast with my SBT school from earlier in September, with about 600 learners. I loved seeing Frances’ classroom and her and her colleagues at work. I’m really excited to try to emulate some of their teaching methods, activities, and classroom layouts. Frances also started a library at her school; it was so fun interacting with the learners who were there after school.

Our last night, we made an awesome dinner together that included an amazing salad with radishes and spinach from Frances’ and her neighbor’s gardens. The sunset from her house was also amazing and we topped off the night with popcorn (big time PC Namibia snack) and half of Pulp Fiction. Exposure was an awesome opportunity to a) see a part of Namibia I will not be living in, b) get to better know a volunteer from a different cohort (thanks for being the hostess with the mostest, Frances!) and c) observe another volunteer and set of teachers in the last term of the school year. So many goals and so many things to try when I get to site.

October 5 also came and went, bringing with it the announcement of my site! For the last 7 weeks, we’ve heard time and time again that it depends. It depends how many learners you will teach, it depends if you have access to a refrigerator, it depends what region you will live in, it depends how far from another volunteer you are. And while many questions will remain unanswered (after all, everyone’s experience is different; most PC questions are unanswerable regardless) each of us now know something.

So, drum roll please….

…….

……

I will be living in….

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******

I can’t tell you. Sorry! (Safety and security everybody, safety and security). It doesn’t really matter though because unless you’re extremely familiar with Namibia, knowing the name of my village won’t make a difference, will it? I can confirm that I will be moving to the Zambezi region for sure! Namibia resembles the shape of the right hand, and I’ll be living in the knuckle of Namibia’s “thumb” (see photos). I received a wonderful packet of information that provided details on my town’s population (5000), school (secondary: grades 8-12), and my house (2-bedroom, sharing with a Namibian teacher). As long as it still works when I get there, I will have access to running water, electricity, a fridge, toilet, and shower.

Maybe I should segway here into what I was expecting/prepared for in terms of my site and living situation: traditional housing, no electricity, no water, seclusion, pit latrine, bucket bathing… And my situation will be kinda the opposite. You might be reading this (especially any of my ciocias and my mom) and be ecstatic. It sounds like a great situation, right? The truth is, I have no idea. Access to these things might make my service easier in certain aspects, and might hinder some personal growth I may have gained otherwise. I really don’t know. I haven’t seen my village, I haven’t met my community, I haven’t really started yet. And I am still excited! I am extremely fortunate to have access to so many amenities; amenities that are not truly necessary for success. I wouldn’t label my reaction to site reveal as disappointed; that’s too exaggerated. I do wish I could tell myself 2 months ago not to expect at all. Don’t expect the presence or lack of something. I mentally prepared myself for lack of amenities, lack of American contact. And in doing this, I still formed expectations around what my service should look like. Core expectation #3 for Peace Corps volunteers is “to serve where you are asked to serve”. The reality of my service life will likely not be what I was imagining, and that’s ok. My service is what I make it, how I deal with the inevitable unexpected, and how I learn, no matter where I am or what resources I have access to.

I am excited to know something, to have one small answer. I am more excited to get to my community and stop expecting things. Just live here and now, enjoying what life is in this moment. I had another reminder of this just this morning (October 6). I was feeling hot and tired after hand washing a double load of laundry (last weekend during exposure visit I didn’t have the chance) and just wanted to be at site already. I didn’t want to be living with a host family, I wanted to cook whenever and whatever I wanted, at that moment I was a little hot and hangry if I’m honest with myself. And my host sister and Boma had been pounding sorghum, maize, and mahangu the entire morning. My host mom came in to take a break and asked if I could sit outside with them. Which, to be honest, was the last thing I wanted to do. After a few more minutes sitting inside watching TV with Bondate, I sucked it up and went outside.

After helping (not very much–I wasn’t very good at the rhythmic art of mahangu pounding and I quickly formed 2 blisters) I somehow felt so much more refreshed. Boma told me about her childhood and how since she was 10 years old, she and her sisters pounded mahangu every 3 or 4 days for their extended families and community. They would just pound all day. She told me how the technique is being lost in her hometown, how people don’t eat or know how to make the traditional foods anymore. We had further discussions on marriage in Namibia and her background, while working together to grind the flour down, sift into a bowl, and repeat. All this discussion happened by just being present. Even though I wasn’t really contributing much to the final product, my Boma invited me to share in her tradition, to see a skill she has so well mastered. To include me as one of her own, as one of her daughters. What a special feeling. I felt honored to be part of the family and asked to partake in the daily activities with everyone else. And that difficult work of pounding in the heat really reframed my mind to today, to enjoying my last few weeks with my host family. Not rushing time. And also a reminder to not get in my own way. To not focus on negatives or the uncontrollable, like being hot, like being tired, and to spend time with people. It doesn’t always take much to make a connection, and I’ll try not to forget that.

In the meantime, it still depends. Doesn’t it always? That’s the nice thing about life. The only constant is change (or whatever that quote is by whoever said it). I’m excited to enjoy my next 2 weeks staying present with my fellow trainees and host family. We swear-in and become volunteers on October 18; I’ll leave for site immediately after the ceremony. More updates will come eventually (I’d say soon if that probably wasn’t a lie, though maybe I’ll surprise myself).

Love you all, here’s some pics:

The mission church in Frances’ town was dedicated to St. James (aka Santiago- it’s hard to tell that he’s holding a shell). The Camino is following me everywhere!

Part of Frances’ library and classroom. She had an awesome room set-up I would love to emulate if I end up with my own classroom.

These are some of my favorite Namibian flowers so far- they also come in orange, light pink, and purple.

Views from exposure visit- edge of the Kalahari.

Amazing sunsets in the south as well

Frances had the cutest house (and check out that garden in the yard–goals)!

There were goats (and palm trees) all over the school grounds.

Red red sand makes permanently dusty shoes

We crossed the tropic line on our way down south! Don’t remember why that’s a significant line of latitude… here’s the sign anyway!

Sunrise back at my training town. Late to my pickup point because I had to stop and stare.

We spent the day at the pool after team building and finding out our site locations. I had never missed water so much!

I’m moving to the “thumb” aka the Zambezi Region!